A lot of people pooh-pooh the very idea of size acceptance. They think size acceptance means taking the easy way out, giving up on oneself, and letting oneself go. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Size acceptance is about acknowledging to yourself that the body you have will not be helped by any more dieting, that the intelligent thing to do is to concentrate on improved health and mobility. Very few of us will ever achieve long-term, substantial, healthy weight loss. We can all make reasonable advances in taking care of and loving ourselves as we are.

There are two Size Wise email lists dedicated specifically to helping people of all sizes achieve their own personal goals in health and improved general lifestyle. They are SizeWisePlus (for people of all sizes), SizeWiseSS (for people larger than approximately 350 lbs.), and Size Wise Health Chat (mainly for off-topic conversations).

To paraphrase Steven Tyler of Aerosmith, size acceptance is a journey, not a destination. It's more work than dieting, but it helps rather than hurting. It's often a two steps forward, one step back process. At the same time it is empowering, giving confidence, strength, and comfort.

I'd like to share a letter with you (with the author's permission, of course) that was sent to one of the Size Wise lists. It beautifully expresses what taking control of your mindset about your body can do for you.

"Hello all,

  "Two and a half years ago, shortly after I found this list, I stopped all dieting and began instead to focus on my health and good nutrition.  What has happened since then is I have become strong, I have stopped all binge eating, and I now once again can buy regular fat clothes, meaning I can now buy clothing at most stores that carry plus sizes, since I stopped dieting I have lost over 100 pounds ( I was recently weighed at a Dr's appt).

"Stopping all dieting was something I was really scared to do as I had been continuously gaining weight since high school with my strict dieting which would lead to starvation and binge eating.  I was afraid if I stopped dieting altogether I would just gain and gain. But really what happened is I stopped being obsessed with food because I denied myself nothing.  I ate whenever and whatever I wanted.  I started trying to discover what good nutrition really is and began to eat things I didn't really care for, such as veggies and whole grains. I would force myself through eating them, just so I could be sure my body was getting all the proper things needed for health.

"I still ate junk food but slowly as my health improved my cravings for and my taste for junk food dissipated altogether.  I now not only do not crave it, I don't even think of it as edible.  Any obsession with food I had is gone.  One of my fantasies when I was a teen was to be able to sit at a table full of food and not feel the overwhelming need to eat it all. I have achieved that.

"It is an irony that I gained steadily while dieting and lost steadily when I stopped. That just kills me.  I have since learned that scientific studies have been proving that dieting makes you fatter then just eating regular all the time. The media and the diet industry have obscured these studies from us.

"So I am no longer a 'super-sized' woman, so to speak, and have become a fat activist.  I have contacted my local community radio station here in Portland - KBOO - and have joined a feminist radio program so I can send out the message to other fat and super-sized women that dieting will kill you.  I have also written a 'Zine' to both get this point across and explore fat fiction and poetry.  I became a writer at age 10 when I couldn't find few good action adventure books featuring girls so I wrote my own and now I need to write stories featuring me again now as a fat woman.

"Don't get me wrong, I love my body as it is, as it was, and as it will become.  It is my tool for living my life and it functions pretty nicely.  What others think of how I look is irrelevant, like my car with all its dents and dings, it serves me and that is all I need."

"This list pointed me to a path I never knew was there.  It has changed my life and way of being.  I am happy more often then not and healthier then I have been since childhood.  THANK YOU!!"

Sincerely,
Myra Grey

It isn't about giving up. It's about stopping the destructive behavior of dieting, figuring out what is good for your body, demanding respect, and living your life in the here and now, not waiting for a smaller number on the scale to start doing the things you want to do. It's your life. Don't lose another minute of it.